Wednesday, January 13, 2016

In Other Words 2015

This year our quotable crew did not disappoint! To quote the most popular and overused phrase in all Brooks' recent prayers “lets hope” this puts a smile on your face today!

The Past:
Kenna: Oh wow Mom, you were so tall and skinny!
Mom: That's Jared {Darla's brother}

Kennedy kids shoveling the driveway in the middle of a huge snow stormBrooks: Wow. You guys have had tragic lives

Gender Roles in 2015
playing with 8 week old kittens
Brooks: Shadow and Marble look like boys to me
Kenna: Brooks! Why would you say that?
Brooks: I don't know, they just look like boys
Kenna: Well I just don't know why you would say such a thing! They are just little kittens! {compassionately} And calling things boys when they are girls is actually very mean and hurtful
word is still out on how offended the kittens were :-)

Grey had come down from bed the previous night with a tummyache
Mom: How's your tummy feel today? Did the DiGize work? (an essential oil)
Grey: Yah. I mean, my tummy doesn't really hurt anymore, except if someone punches me in the stomach, or kicks me, then it still hurts
Mom: Ok, well, that's totally normal. My tummy would hurt too if someone punched me
Grey, in a "duh/captain obvious" tone: uh, yah, but that's cause you're a woman

Guessing at a friends baby gender, all three kids decided on Boy
Mom: I don't know, I'll say girl I guess
Kenna: Why?
Mom: Well, because I was born first, and I had a girl first, so I just think it's sweet to have a girl first I guess. I'm actually surprised you didn't say girl!
Kenna: Yah, well, for their sake, I do hope it is a girl. Like, otherwise people never have any more kids
Mom, raised eyebrows
Kenna: You know, like if you have a boy first it's like "Whooooooo, I'm not having any more kids", but if you have a girl first you're like "oooooook, now we can have more kids" because when you have a boy first you're so busy chasing them around, you just can't ever think about more kids

Mom wearing camo capri's...
Grey: Oh, those are cool pants, Mom. You know, womens can go to war. I mean, not you, 'cause you're too old, and fat. But skinny womens can go to war, if they want

Grey tries on his Antman costume
Brooks: Wow. Grey has 8 abs, and boobs!
Thankfully he said it in a really impressed tone, and Grey was all too pleased with his insta-body-sculpting

On Multitasking:
Telling me all the particulars of yet another lego creation
Mom: Ok, that's great, but can you show me later because I'm trying to watch this
Grey: Yah, but you can watch that, and listen to me, that's called doing two separates

On Food:
Reading over my shopping list
Brooks: wine. Wine? WINE?!
Mom: Yes, I use it in recipes, like Chicken Marsala
Brooks: Kenna! Kenna!! Mom is trying to drunk us!!

having a 'who can eat fastest' competition
Grey: No Brooks! NO! That's cheating! You're cheating! You can't just swallow you hafta chew! MOM! Brooks is cheating!
Brooks: It's not called cheating, it's called technique

buying a bag of "regular" carrots for cooking...
Brooks: Woah! Kenna! Look at these way overgrown carrots!!
so maybe we buy baby carrots a little too often...

Grey: I am really sens-titive about hotness, Sonny, so don't even talk to me about hotness, or I might be burned, I am really that sens-titive

May, not wanting to eat a "cookie" I made - no sugar, no flour, and whole food "diet" approved
Kenna, offers encouragement: Just eat it May, it's just a cookie. Well, I mean, it is a healthy cookie, so it's really not that good, but just eat it

I accidentally dropped some butter from my knife...
Kenna, reporting to Dad: ...and then Mom just threw butter across the room, scooped it up off the floor, put it on her bread and ate it!! Canadians sure do weird things!

On Delegation:
Sent to clean her room...
Mom: What are you doing out here?
Kenna: Oh, just waiting. The kids actually like crawling under my bed, so they're getting everything out for me, even the crumbs. It's really a win-win for me

On Kindness:
some type of ruckus results in Grey's crying...
Brooks: Kenna! Dad says comfort people when you do damage to them!

On Prayer:
Grey, at dinner: I wanna pray! K, Jesus, please make sure the world doesn't turn into, umm, {long pause}, wait, nevermind, I need to start over. Dear Jesus, thank you for making humans, and tools. Amen

Getting ice cream...
Brooks, reading the signage: awwww, yogurt?
Kenna: No Brooks really, I've had it before. It tastes just like ice cream, only it's super healthy for you
Brooks, looking shocked/lightbulb moment: My prayers have been answered!!!
So apparently we need to have a discussion on what constitutes a worthy prayer request...aaaaaaannnnd what we'd consider to be the definition of "super healthy”

On Aging:
heading to a friends birthday party...
Kenna (age 9): Is Abram turning 6?
Brooks (age 8): No, he's already 6! He's turning 7
Kenna: Wow, 7? That just blows my mind
Brooks, with a sigh: I know, they just grow up so fast

Brooks: Did you know that Eli's Great Great Great Great Great Grandma is 99 years old?
Mom: hmm, wow, that's very old
Kenna: Uh, no! That is too many Greats. That would be like his ancestors in Egypt or whatever

overhearing a conversation...
Kenna: no, Mom is middle age
Brooks: No, middle age is 20, so Mom's already in old age
Kenna: No, old age is 40, so she's still technically in middle age, but sort of in old age

Getting out the Christmas decor
Kenna: See this book is torn, and you have to be careful with it because it's very old
Brooks: How old?
Mom: I don't know exactly, it was mine when I was little
Brooks: oh ok, so it is really old then
and a day just wouldn't be complete with my old age somehow factoring in:-)

Brooks: Mom, I only counted four burgers!
Mom: Yes, one for you and Grey, and Kenna said she wanted two. The adults are eating steak
Brooks: There are adults coming?!
Mom: Your father and I are adults
Brooks: Oh, right

On Creativity:
Heading to church for a meeting
Mom: Did you guys grab the bag with toys and stuff to play with?
Kenna: Oh, no, we forgot it. But that's ok. We can just play rock paper scissors or another made up game. We're very creative like that

driving in the city...
Kenna: Oh look, a horse!
Mom: Huh?
Kenna: The clouds. They look like shapes! (condescendingly) You can only see them if you have imagination. Oh, see! A snake
Mom: Riiiight. Real creative. A snake.

Mom, about to to start an activity with the kids: Alrighty boys, lets make some magic!
Kenna: Uuuhh, no. Magic has totally already been invented

On Nationality:
Brooks: We are really lucky that Dad married a Canadian
yes, I like to think of it that way too:-)

Kids getting riled up and crazy before bed. Brian blames all negative behaviours on their Canadian roots...
Brian: I can't believe I'm surrounded by so many Canadians
Darla: Uh, no! They are just as much American. And anyway, how do you think I feel moving here and being surrounded by so many Americans!
Brian: Blessed?

On Talent:
Kenna: Brooks is really good at copying voices
Brooks: It's called vocal manipulation

after her piano recital
Mom: Were you nervous?
Kenna: Nope! ...But I was really, like, hot

putting on his roller blades
Brooks: Hey, what is the speed limit around here?
Oh the confidence. No worries son, I assure you, you need not be concerned

On Modern Convenience:
Grey: Can you lower down the stand you use to scan the clothes, so I can play on it?
Mom: That is called ironing. It's an ironing board

On Being Brian...
While preparing desserts for a wedding
Pastor Dan (I can't recall his exact words, but jist was): Your Dad is lucky, he gets to be the taste tester
Kenna: Yah, he gets to be the one who says 'meh, that's kinda okay'
If you know Brian, you know that this is actually akin to a rave review. LOL!!

Convo while out to dinner with friends...
Friend: If you could write a book on any topic, what would it be about?
*everyone pauses to think a moment*
Brian: Comedic timing
Bahahaha! Literally there is no one else who can make me die laughing while rolling my eyes. Heart him. And his "comedic timing"

Starting to drive out of our parking spot before the kids were seated/buckled. Another car started to pull out, so I applied the brakes...
Brooks: Whoa!!
Mom: Sorry. We were going to hit someone
Grey: Uh, no. We weren't going to hit anyone, you were. You are driving, notus
This is so annoyingly Brian's child, I don't even know what to say sometimes;-)

How the World Works:
Mom: Wow guys, they're tracking a 12 ft female tiger shark named Chessie off our beach
Kenna: What?! What are we going to do?!
Mom: Nothing. They'll let us know if it's going to be a problem
Kenna: The world is just sooooo deathly! I mean, it's like with every step you take, you have a fifty-percent chance of dying!!

Kenna: If you've touched fog, you've touched a dying cloud

Grey: I climbed all the way to the top! My heart was going like boom boom boom! It was like my heart was trying to escape from my lungs!!

On Money:
Grey swallowed a coin, and we had to "go fishing" for it
Brooks: Can I buy this sour candy?
Mom: How much money do you have?
Grey: I wish I had any money. Can I have money?
Brooks: No! You don't get any. Mom's afraid you're going to nibble on it

Grey: Sonny we are not poor! My mom has two hundred and eighty three dollars!

On Intelligence:
Mom, staring blankly across the table at no one in particular, but in Grey's general direction
Grey: What? Don't look at me, I'm not the dummo in this family!
Mom: Huh? What's a dummo
Grey, in a "duh" sarcastic tone: A dumb person
I'm afraid to ask who he thinks *is* the "dummo" :-)

Brooks: Where are we?
Mom: You don't recognize it the street?
Kenna: I do, I just forget what it's called
Mom: I'll give you a hint...there are 4 universal navigational directions - this is one of them
Kenna: Um, oh! Left, right...up...and down?
Mom: No! North...
Kenna: RIGHT! East Beach!

Asking me a question about her school work...
Kenna: This just says "My Shadow", if I put quotes around it, what is it? A story, or a song?
Mom: Hmmm, I don't know. It could be the title of a poem, or it could be a story...
Grey: Or it could be a legend!

getting down to the end of the toothpaste
Brooks: Uggghh! We're almost outagain! I don't get it, it says it's supposed to last two plus years!
Mom: No, that is how old you have to be to use the toothpaste!
The tube clearly states 2+, so I guess that's a logical conclusion:-)

On Behaviour:
We have a few small gifts/rewards the kids can earn with our blessing/if-then charts...
Brooks, telling Daddy: ...and now there's a competition for the comic book, because Kenna says she might be interested in it, so it's like, who's going to have the most points, because Kenna is able to be good consistently, and me and Grey, not so much

Words To Live By:
Grey, holding scissors "incorrectly"
Kenna: Hey, a tip for you. Always hold scissors facing down, otherwise you'll fall and they'll stab you in the gullet
Brooks, randomly waving around a walmart bag like a rhythmic dancer: And here's another tip for you. Never put a bag over your head
Kenna: Yes, or you could die
Grey, without skipping a beat, but with the obvious tone of "stop running my life", decides to offer up a tip of his own: Oh yah? Well, here's a tip, don't eat yellow snow!

In Other Words 2014
In Other Words 2013
In Other Words 2012

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