Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Prayer for the Bride and Groom

I forgot to post a little wedding love back in June - so here it is in Sept. This prayer was said at my parents wedding in 1977. My Grandpa prayed it at our wedding in 2003. I love to re-read it, and pray it, because it is so so rich in truth. It's amazing how much "all of life and it's issues" are just neatly covered in this prayer.


O God of love, Thou hast established marriage for the welfare and happiness of mankind. Thine was the plan and only with Thee can we work it out with joy. Thou hast said "It is not good for man to be alone, I will make a help meet for him." Now our joys are doubled since the happiness of one is the happiness of the other. Our burdens now halved, since when we share them, we divide the load.

Bless this husband. Bless him as the provider of nourishment and raiment, and sustain him in all the exactions and pressures of his toil. May his strength be her protection, his character her boast and pride, and may he so live that she will find in him the haven for which the heart of a woman truly longs.

Bless this loving wife. Give her a tenderness that will make her great, a deep sense of understanding and a great faith in Thee. Give her that inner beauty of soul that never fades, that eternal youth that is found in holding fast the things that never age.

Teach them that marriage is not living merely for each other; it is two uniting and joining hands to serve Thee. Give them a great spiritual purpose in life. May they first seek the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and the other things shall be added unto them.

May they not expect that perfection of each other that belongs alone to Thee. May they minimize each others weaknesses, be swift to praise and magnify each others points of comeliness and strength, and see each other through a lovers kind and patient eyes.

Now make such assignments to them on the scroll of Thy will as will bless them and develop their characters as they walk together. Give them enough tears to keep them tender, enough hurts to keep them human, enough of failure to keep their hands clenched tightly in Thine and enough of success to make them sure they walk with God.

May they never take each others love for granted but always experience that breathless wonder that exclaims, "Out of all this world you have chosen me."

When life is done and the sun is setting, may they be found then as now, still hand in hand, still thanking God for each other. May they serve Thee happily faithfully, together, until at last one shall lay the other into the arms of God.

This we ask through Jesus Christ, great lover of our souls. Amen.

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

The Tides!

We don't have any professional teams here in our area, but we do have a few minor league teams. We have a triple A ball team here, and it's been years since we've gone to see them play with the kids! So long that Kenna and Brooks don't even remember going, and Grey has never been!

We had a little family night in 100+ degree weather, whew! But it was fun.
Another first, we bought cotton candy (the big bag!) from the guy in the aisle. The kids were pretty much mind-blown at that:-) Also mind blown over the fact that Daddy didn't want any - (of course Mommy did!). Sonny & May (and their parents) came too, so that was a fun thing to get to do together.
Brooks brought his glove, and a few balls came near us, but none that he could get. The Tides were losing badly, so we left in the 8th inning - the kids didn't understand why, but I explained my Dad's trick...

I've never seen the end of a sports game live, in my life I don't think...but I always beat the traffic out of there:-)

Random Thoughts

Ideas or quotes I come across that I find funny, silly, inspirational, true...and just plain random!

If you want to change the world, go home and love your family. Mother Teresa

Believe me, every heart has it's secret sorrows, which the world knows not, and oftentimes we call a man cold, when he is only sad. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Using cynicism to protect yourself from the bravery that having hope requires is the sneakiest form of cowardice there is. Jon Acuff

If there was one thing he disliked more than another in a world full of objectionable happenings, it was this. PG Wodehouse

Mrs Darling: There are many different kinds of bravery. There's the bravery of thinking of others before one's self. Now, your father has never brandished a sword nor fired a pistol, thank heavens. But he has made many sacrifices for his family, and put away many dreams.
Michael: Where did he put them?
Mrs Darling: He put them in a drawer. And sometimes, late at night, we take them out and admire them. But it gets harder and harder to close the drawer...He does. And that is why he is brave.
J.M. Barrie (Peter Pan)

Above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you, because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it. Roald Dahl

Don't be fooled by the idea of calling: it's not some mystical dream life we think we deserve to live out; it's stewarding + living out well what we've been given to discover that it's really more than we deserve...Discovering 'our calling' in the everyday has so much less to do with WHAT we are doing and more to do with WHY we are doing what we're doing. This is how God's teaching me to #learntolovewhatmustbedone today..." Ruth Chou Simons

He said "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."The Velveteen Rabbit

I'm so happy! I know a million others have said it before, but none with such justice. Elizabeth Bennett, Death Comes to Pemberley

There are many little old ladies serving in church nurseries who may not understand how to articulate the theories of gospel-centeredness or have the ingenuity to dazzle our minds with psychological insights, cultural observations, and Christocentric interpretations of Old Testament passages. Their hearts, however, burn with love for Jesus and overflow with gratefulness for His grace...So don't be quick to judge them. Be humbled by them. Mastering the theology of gospel-centeredness is not the point. Loving the God of the gospel is. J.D. Greear

Recent studies show that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than do the men who mention it. Unknown

Wisdom is not primarily a function of how clever we are, nor of how much information we have managed to cram into our minds. Rather it is a moral choice to be independent of God or to be subject to him in our thinking as well as our doing. Graham Goldsworthy

No Christian can avoid theology. Every Christian is a theologian. Perhaps not a theologian in the technical or professional sense, but a theologian nonetheless. The issue for Christians is not whether we are going to be theologians but whether we are going to be good theologians or bad ones. R.C. Sproul

A life outside of Christ is both hard and frightening; a life in Christ has hard edges and dark valleys, but it is purposeful even when painful. Rosaria Champagne Butterfield

You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body. CS Lewis

And I think I'm kind of a nice guy. Being a nice guy, trying to prove that nice guys don't always finish last. Darius Rucker

If I had a nickel for every time I was doomed by a puppet, I'd have...two nickels! Which isn't a lot, but really, it's weird that it happened twice, right? Dr. Doofenshmirtz

The ancient man approached God (or even the gods) as the accused person approaches his judge. For the modern man, the roles are reversed. He is the judge: God is in the dock... the trial may even end in God's acquittal. But the important thing is that Man is on the bench and God in the dock. CS Lewis

You may be whatever you resolve to be. Stonewall Jackson

Jesus is greater than I have ever portrayed Him to be. Tweeted by @JohnPiper

Don't base the number of kids you want on the pain in the {butt} of infancy, because it's so finite. Base it on how many people you want at Thanksgiving. Gwenyth Paltrow

Friday, August 12, 2016

Happy 37th Birthday!

My facebook birthday post from this year. Since I was seriously lagging in my blogging at that time, I'm catching up now!
Happy birthday to the love of my life. Love is surprising sometimes, and this was one of those times. Life is surprising sometimes, and certainly it has not turned out the way I imagined it would be. Because usually imaginations, though we think we dream of far off things, are limited by what we think, know and desire. We can't begin to see the greatness until we are pushed passed what we can't even imagine, into an unfamiliar realm. In a certain sense, it's a failure of life - it's not gone according to plans. And in another sense, it's the fulfilment of dreams you dreamed, you just lacked vision enough to supply all the grand particulars. Because had you known, you would have imagined them in the first place. Life has been surprising me ever since 1998, I guess. And this one has been the reason. He's pushed me into realms I'd never imagined, but in so doing, fulfilled my dreams, instead of dashing them. I am so grateful for him. Happy birthday Brian James. #hockeyhair #raisedbycanadians #lovehim #loveloyaltyfriendship

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Love Your Spouse Challenge

Well, these things "go around" facebook, and while I was enjoying reading others' posts, I was kind of glad I hadn't been called upon to participate...I kind of feel like everyone already knows everything, right?! I don't know. I just guess I wasn't really in the mood or something. And then I got "tagged". You're it! Well, I didn't really have a plan or idea, so I just started posting off the top of head! Here are the 7 days, all rolled into one post. Just because we need to keep proof on hand that I love that guy;-)

Day 1 -
I was nominated for the Love Your Spouse challenge by Sarah. For day 1, Here we are, at 23 years old, but babies. We'd already known each other for 4 years. I'm volunteering at the Markham Fair, and he's just waiting around for my shift to be over. He's done a lot of waiting around over the years. A lot. He's determined and patient (and I'm really not). This was the day before we officially began our dating relationship (which was mostly long distance). More about that another day, perhaps. But I thought maybe I should start back where it all began! I nominate Amy & Kari! I think you're supposed to post for 7 days...ummm... Because love is nice? It sure beats all the usa politics on my feed;-) I guess I didn't look into the rules before accepting the challenge (somewhat typical of me! Haha)

Day 2 - 
Well, here we are in 2004. When everything we owned in our 500sq ft apartment fit into a very small trailer, and we left NY (me having only lived there for 11 months) to move to VA. We really had no idea what we were doing, though I'm sure at the time we felt we did:-) One of the things that I am begrudgingly grateful for is Brian's vision and plan for our family. I say begrudging, because if it were up to me (the play it safe non risk taker aka: worrywart), we'd still be renting an apartment in Rochester, I'm sure (because all other options seem scary!). But after being somewhat dragged along (even if just in my own mind), I eventually see the wisdom in it all. I am so grateful that, while he does listen to my cautions, he isn't afraid to do what he feels is right. I'm very glad God saw fit to give me to a man so different from myself - because it's allowed me to grow and change in ways I never would have forced myself to do otherwise. And it's landed me in a place I never would have imagined, but couldn't love more!

Day 3 - 

"He must be so tall that when he is on his knees, he reaches all the way to heaven. His shoulders must be broad enough to bear the burden of a family. His lips must be strong enough to smile, firm enough to say no, and tender enough to kiss. He must be big enough to be gentle and great enough to be thoughtful. His arms must be strong enough to carry a child." (Ruth Graham). I love his patience, with me, and our kids. Its not one of my outstanding qualities, so the contrast is evident. I want to do everything "this instant", and he is willing to take the long way around, when needed. I like that. I wish I could do that. I'm so thankful that he is long suffering in his love for me. I'm so glad that he always seems to assume the best in me

Day 4 - 
This is a picture from where we met. We worked together, and were not particularly good friends, but friendly co-workers. Then, we got in trouble for things you only ever get in trouble for at very strict places (accused relationship after going to church with another mutual friend). It all was very innocent, but the accusation was very off-putting to me, so that was the end of that. I don't think I spoke a single word to him, let alone entered a room he was in for a solid 18 months. Since there had been "nothing going on", I didn't want it to appear as though we'd somehow just escaped trouble, and I had plenty of friends. He didn't need to be one of them. And he wasn't. So all of this was our strange beginning. And it's not particularly "loving" haha. But what was displayed in all of these shenanigans was character. Not so much mine, but his. Well, sure enough, my character *was* revealed, and it wasn't much to look at. Unless you somehow place high value on grudge holding, and people avoiding (to make myself appear "better"), but I really haven't found a lot of people who like those things;-) But one of the things that comes to mind when I think of Brian in those days is "consistent". He has never pretended to be anything other than what he is. Don't get me wrong, that meant *plenty* of trouble for him, because conservative Christian places 'have a rule for that' to be sure. But he didn't govern his behaviour based on the crazy flavour of the day. He was solid in what he believed, and he's exactly the same now as he was then, outside of the normal growth and change in life. I have always appreciated this consistency in character, and it's one of the things I will always love about him.

Day 5
I was asked after yesterdays post to share how we got together in the end. Well, that's a long story, and I'm only half of it, but I'll try to do justice to his side of the tale. The backstory is that we were introduced in Indianapolis by a mutual friend, Matt Coleman in 1998. I don't remember this encounter at all, haha. If I think about it really hard, I can picture it all, based on his descriptions and details, but yeah, no real memory of this. So in 1999 Brian had the chance to come work at the same place I worked, and he didn't base his decision to go solely on the fact that I was there - but it was a factor;-) So I met Brian (the one I remember), in Chicago in 1999. First impression on my end was not winning. It was obvious right from the start that this guy would say *anything* he wanted to, regardless of situation or location. People like this were trouble in a conservative Christian situation, and my friend Audra marked him off the bat as "trouble". In his opinion, I ignored him, simply because he worked in the warehouse and I didn't...because I was a snob. In my opinion, I was just behaving myself. Befriending random people (opposite gender) was frowned upon. And the fact that we didn't work together meant that I'd have to go out of my way to be nice to him, and I had zero reason to do that. Snob - or just trying to be good. Potato, potatoe. He came to work in my department, and we became friends. Not great friends, but friends enough. After the situation with us getting in trouble I was QUITE sure this guy was a NO on every level. Although he was left with the opposite impression, that I was a YES. So while I set about to make his general existence fairly uncomfortable, he set about to try to be friends. I refused to speak to him. So he figured out a way to put himself in a position where I *had* to speak to him for work issues. I was organizing a homeschool conference. He figured out a way to get himself on the travel team that came to my conferences etc. Small (and annoying to me) insertions into my life where I really had no choice but to be at least cordial:-) With enough time and space between me and HQ in Chicago (I was now working from Canadian location), and with enough of his general prying (thinking up any excuse to talk to me), I started to see that my reactions were at least slightly overdramatic, and I started to feel badly (I was basically borderline or not borderline rude to him on multiple occasions - and in public. He'd enter the lunch room, I'd glare and exit - this kind of thing, so immature). Anyway, I started to feel bad about it, and winter of '00 I apologized to him for being overly dramatic about the situation. It was a fairly lame, and not very thorough apology, but he was like "hey, no problem! actually a bunch of us (from HQ) are going skiing this weekend in NY, want to come?" I was like...UUUUUUHHHH, again rude? Lol. I said "I have to ask my parents" because I was quite sure they'd say no. But they said yes. So I went. It was fine. This picture is from that ski trip. After that, we became friends for real. But just over AIM or email basically. There was another ski trip the next winter. And we were engaged the winter after that! This guy definitely has a vision for his long-range goals!  The whole "story of us" is basically defined by his patience and long suffering.This guy can put up with a lot, and is quick to forgive. I'm so grateful he's mine!

Day 6 - 
 I forgot about this -busy day! So, we'll do an easy one... You ain't too bad to look at, Babe

Day 7
Well here we are at the end of the challenge. It's been a fun exercise in "speaking love" and it's always so nice to reflect on old pictures and memories. At the end of the day, I am grateful that God gave me to this man, knowing all my flaws, and knowing all of his. Does he always “love me as Christ loves the church”? No. Does he always anticipate every need, and emotion and respond in the way I desire? No. Do I honour him in my heart all the time, and choose to believe the best of him? No. Am I a proper helpmeet, setting aside selfish desires and making a priority the things I know he values/wants as he leads our family? No. I know this is sounding like a bit of a bummer...BUT. God brought us together. He sustains us. Life is not perfect, and of course we will never be perfect husbands or wives. But life together is great fun. I'm better for the time we've spent together, and that makes me happy. I will always be grateful he chose to love me.
“Now make such assignments to them on the scroll of Thy will as will bless them and develop their characters as they walk together. Give them enough tears to keep them tender, enough hurts to keep them human, enough failure to keep their hands clenched tightly in Thine and enough of success to make them sure they walk with God. May they never take each others love for granted, but always experience that breathless wonder that exclaims, 'out of all this world, you have chosen me'. When life is done and the sun is setting, may they be found then as now, still hand in hand, still thanking God for each other.”

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Happy Pictures

These pics were taken by our friend Virginia, she was the photographer at a wedding we attended in May.
Love this kid. Those eyes!

Brian and his right hand man at work, Stewie. Also, he is Virginia's hubby:-)

Then & Now - the Stats

The thing that made this recent trip so special for us, was the length of time since we were ALL together. We've come close before, but one thing or another prevented a complete "reunion". With so many schedules of so many people, it's kind of not surprising, right?!

So, the last time we were all together was November 2005...
Since then, we've added...

5 Spouses
16 (will be 18 soon!) Grandkids
10 houses
7 highschool graduations
1 university graduation
1 retirement
multiple near death experiences (thanks Brent, -no surprise, right?!)
1 car fire
1 song on the radio (Logan's band)
1 trip to China, and
1,237 allergies (all belonging to one person;-)

March 2016
The next we coordinate a big get-together, maybe it'll have to be on a cruise ship or something. You know, someplace big enough to hold us all;-)